The Social & Political Life of Shame

Illustration depicting a red and white triangular warning sign with a shame concept. Dark sky background.

Here’s a brilliant short paper, authored by Mary Watkins, exploring the impact of deserved and undeserved shame in this political landscape we’re currently in. It’s a call for us to be better and to create pathways for restorative justice.

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What Going To Therapy Is Like

“Going to therapy is like getting a PhD in who you are.”

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Sex Addiction & Porn Addiction Concepts Are Failing Clients


Here’s an article I collaborated on entitled, How The Concepts of “Sex Addiction” and “Porn Addiction” are Failing Clients, published in the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists’ Magazine, The Therapist, in their September/October 2016 issue.

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The Myth of Sex Addiction

The Myth of Sex Addiction by Dr. David Ley

Labels like sex addict, love addict and porn addict are becoming much more frequently used in pop culture.  But does sex addiction, love addiction and porn addiction even really exist? Currently, these “diagnoses” have not been accepted into the “Bible of Mental Disorders” — the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders (DSM-5).  Despite heavy lobbying

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The Sexual Dependency Inventory


An esteemed colleague of mine, Dr. David Ley (shown in the video I created above), wrote a blog for Psychology Today that was removed due to legal threat from some in the Sex Addiction Industry.  Below is his introductory note, and formerly published article.   Note by Dr. David Ley: “The  below post was originally

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Healing From Narcissistic Abuse


Being in a relationship with a Narcissist — whether as a friend, co-worker, family member, date, or intimate relationship — can be one of the most difficult and painful relationships to navigate.  While we all have legitimate needs for validation, someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) takes it to a whole other, destructive, level. In order

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Mindful Hiking, Yosemite Wilderness

Handstand at Ten Lakes

  “Yosemite Valley, to me, is always a sunrise, a glitter of green and golden wonder in a vast edifice of stone and space.” — Ansel Adams

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Difficulties Using Insurance for Psychotherapy

A frequent question I receive from potential new clients wanting individual or couples counseling, is do I take insurance…perfectly appropriate question to ask.  But the answer can get a little complicated — it’s different using insurance for therapy versus other physical health problems where you’re seeing a medical doctor. Let me help clarify why using

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Couples Communication 101

Most couples come in to therapy interested in improving the way that they communicate with each other.  It may be that they either don’t communicate their needs and avoid conflict OR that they have endless conflict that doesn’t get resolved.  In either case, it can feel like they are not heard, understood and cared for.

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Couples Counseling Can Save Your Relationship

Have you ever been curious if couples counseling could improve your relationship?  Do you want outside help to create a better relationship or to end your relationship amicably?  Whether you’re in a high-conflict or conflict-avoidant relationship, whether you’re interested in rebuilding trust, communicating more effectively, or deepening vulnerability and intimacy with your partner(s), couples counseling

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